Everyone needs a best friend. If you don’t agree with me, you probably will by the time you finish reading this post. How would you really describe a best friend? A best friend can take many forms: someone who you can rely on and trust to be present whenever you need them (except they have a very good reason not to be); someone who genuinely cares about you and would defend you always, even when you’re not present. I’m sure there are many other ways you can describe a best friend (and I’d really love to know your thoughts on this in the comment section of this post) but, probably, a few of the best descriptions of a best friend are someone who will not condemn you no matter what, who will not take advantage of you, whose company you enjoy a lot and never get tired of, and one who can assume any role you need them to at any moment. What I mean is that your best friend can assume the role of a friend, father, mother, brother, sister, mentor, etc. A friend can assume the role of an older brother or sister if you don’t have one and just need someone to pamper you but not like a parent or friend. And if you’re like me who does not have a biological younger sibling, a best friend is someone who can play that role when you feel the need to pamper someone. And last but not least, a best friend is someone who can portray the role of a boss. (Yes, sometimes, you definitely need someone who can boss you around in order to compel you to get some work done!😉)
Is this Even Possible?
Now, I know you might be thinking: Wow! That is a HUGE responsibility to place on anybody. How can one person assume such many roles all by themselves? They’re just going to burn out. That is just impossible! Well, you’re probably right! Although some people are blessed to have such friends at certain points in their lives, it is truly difficult for any single human to maintain such a level of demand. After all, they also have their own lives to live, right? You might even genuinely want to live up to this responsibility with your best friends, but for how long? If/when you get married, are you still going to be there for them in the same capacity as before? What if they needed you at the same time your family did? Do you see where I’m going with this? It is humanly impossible for you to fulfil that role forever. As a matter of fact, I would argue that your spouse should be the one you might call your best friend. If that is not the case, then you’re definitely building on a faulty foundation, one that you urgently need to fix.
Now, you might be thinking: Gotcha! My spouse can definitely fill those shoes. S/he can be a friend, father, mother, brother, sister, or mentor whenever I need one. They can love me genuinely, care for me, cherish me, and never condemn me or take advantage of me. And, oh, they can also play the role of my boss excellently. In fact, that is their best role. 😜 Haha! Yes, you’re definitely correct in your assertions. I cannot deny that you might have such an experience. However, if you read that previous paragraph again, you will notice the sentence, “It is humanly impossible for you to fulfil that role forever.” The two emphases that make all the difference in that sentence are ‘humanly’ and ‘forever.’ Your spouse may meet the requirement of the former but may not that of the latter. And I’m not talking about as long as you have blood flowing through your veins. The forever actually refers to FOREVER AND EVER – beyond life itself. And that is where the human requirement crashes since no flesh and blood can exist beyond this life.
Okay, so (hopefully) we’re now on the same page regarding the fact that those you currently call your best friend(s) might not really be so when push comes to shove or cannot be so forever. Please don’t get me wrong, I am in no way trying to void your ‘best-friendship’ with anyone. I am just saying that you probably need to find ‘another’ person who would be able to fulfill that role always, even after death (since our souls never really die). You can still keep your ‘best friend’ but that ‘other person’ would always top the list.
Does Everyone Need a Best Friend?
Finally, let’s return to our opening statement: “Everyone needs a best friend.” If you’re thinking, I won’t ever need anyone to fulfill that role. I’m okay the way I am. Well, I would assume that you missed the most important point in the last two paragraphs, so let me just repeat it here in a different way. If you are about to go into a major surgical procedure and you are permitted to have only one person there with you holding your hand and reassuring you that everything is going to be okay and that they’re going to be there when you go under and when you wake up, who would you choose to play that role? I really hope you answered, A family member, or A friend; because you would be killing the flow now if you said, Myself,🙄 and it would be really weird if you said, My high school bully. Now, going by our all-inclusive definition of a best friend, it is convenient to say that we can substitute the phrase ‘best friend’ for ‘a family member’ or ‘a friend’. But, if you didn’t have a best friend, you would have no one there at that surgery, because, even if you had someone there who could not adequately fulfill that role, it would be as though no one was there at all. Further, my next question will dispel any doubts you might still have as to whether you need a best friend: Do you deserve to have a best friend? Whatever your response, that is what it is.
Why Did I Make this Post?
The inspiration to make this post came after the revelation I had through God’s word (you can read all about it here). Basically, the revelation made me realize that how I and most Christians viewed God was wrong, and that this led to a major flaw in our prayer lives; one that God so desperately wants to correct. In order to get a wholesome blessing from this post, I strongly suggest you head over and read that other post too.
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I was around 5 when, I am strongly convinced, I first heard the distinct voice of God. But, not until I was 11 (2002) did I have a personal encounter with Him. I was in my room that night, about to pray before bed, when I saw a revelation of how filthy my heart was. I didn't argue with God that I was too young to have such amount of filth ('cause I believed I was a 'good boy,' by human standards, at least). I simply cried uncontrollably in brokenness of heart - "The sacrifice you desire is a broken spirit. You will not reject a broken and repentant heart, O God" (Psalm 51:17) - and He didn't.
Still crying uncontrollably, I left my room and went to the living room, where my parents were watching the nightly news on TV. After I managed to tell them about the revelation I saw, my sweet mum took me to her room and led me to Christ. I got saved that night. And 6 years later, I discovered my purpose and assignment on earth, which is raising up men and women to be godly, and teaching them the simplicity of Christianity. More than a decade later, I am still fulfilling that purpose to His glory. Hallelujah!